Stakes, Spoils, and Post-Match Punishment

Some very good points raised here.
Ultimately, the entire point of a stakes match is that it must fall within that window of "Willing to do" but also "Don't *want* to do". For some guys, that can be a very narrow window.
If the stakes aren't in the latter category, then it is more of a reward than a punishment, indulging a fetish. If you *want* to be tied up and fucked, it's not a stake to wrestle for, it should be your *reward* if you win.
Likewise, if the stake falls outside of the former, then you might chicken out of actually doing it, which wastes everyone's time, or if you go through with it, or it can be genuinely traumatic and not just the humiliation/discomfort it's intended as.

So I think it works best if it's a more creative, bearable stake that is both fun/lighthearted as well as humiliating or mildly painful. Here's an idea, loser is stripped naked, lies on their back, and a time limit is set, say 10 minutes. Winner then starts jacking loser off *vigorously*, like full tight grip power jacking. But here's the punishment part: They *keep* jacking until that time limit expires, regardless of if or when the loser cums. have you ever kept jacking after orgasm? It hurts and feels good at the same time, and quickly becomes unbearable. Imagine cumming in the fist 5 minutes and knowing your softening, sensitive dick is going to be tortured with jackhammer pumping for another 5. It would be real punishment, but ultimately harmless and therefore viable. If you came *during* the match, your incentive would then be to last as long as possible before making a final submission to give yourself time to "recharge"

(to be continued)

Not bad, but I could probably take the 10 mins without cumming lol

I do this all the time in my matches - jack past my opponent cumming. Really hot. And now that guys know I’m going to do it to them when I win they commonly do it to me if I lose.

Im want take match

I bet you will lose that Pump jock Anaconda :-)

Nah boy you loose

Is this challenge for Kimmetje or for me Anaconda?
I would be pleased to kick your ass!!

Let's fier see if he gets his first combat star 🤣

(continued)
Claiming speedos/trunks as a trophy is also a great one, as it's harmless but is a palpable loss to the loser. Speedos aren't exactly cheap after all, and some guys have a favourite pair they like to wrestle in, that may have sentimental value. A guy who has built up a collection of claimed pairs can display them in their wrestling room to show their prowess and reputation too.

Bondage is a tricky one as the line is very fine between the limit of consensual activity ands real abuse. One option may be to lock the loser in a chastity device and post the key to them, so they're stuck in it for a few days. Likewise with a slave collar, then they have to either hide it from other people (workmates, family etc) or come up with an excuse for why they are wearing it until the key arrives.

Humiliation-wise, I'm thinking the winner cums all over the loser, then forces them to put their clothes back on over the top of the drying sweat and cum and travel home like that, no shower. Harmless, unpleasant enough to want to be avoided (especially if they have to use public transport) but temporary.

Sorry for the text dump essay, but I think this is a good topic that deserves further discussion.

And you contributed some excellent ideas that I might just have to borrow!

How i get my first star?

That's easy, have your first real life match with a member of the site and when both of you have confirmed the match then you get it! Important so that your challenges seem more credible!

This is why cash+ other stakes works, nobody wants to lose cash.

Could be another one, for me also loss of my gear would be another one, I love each of them too much to want to part with them!

If i am in talks for stakes for top with a guy and get the vib that he wants to lose i make it more interesting. Make the loser jo eat his spunk then top him. Then it is usually not wanted and more of a punishment.

i'd be up for that scenario
dominate and humiliate me

This is exactly the problem. You have no interest in a stakes match. You just have an interest in being dominated and humiliated. The sex interests you not the power struggle.

Thank you for pointing that out. Perfect example of the problem. On a thread calling out people for just commenting about what turns them on instead of actual competition, he does exactly that. Unbelievable.

Also, to anyone reading through this, sorry for my last two comments. Not sure if it was spell check or a stroke, but I unfortunately can’t edit them to make them make sense.

I Agree,

Punishment should be real punishment otherwise it would not work as stakes to improve the competition. One important rule for that is that the loser can not decide when it is finished. Stakes and rules must be set in advance and no discussion possible after the fight.

I think Dave's version of the stakes could work, if the other guy has his sexual desire cut off and must continue to perform after the fact it's a lot less pleasurable :D

Doesn't sound like it would work for you then lol

Totally agree. I often say, "the site is meetfighters, not meat market." If I just wanted sex I would be using Grindr.

I like many types of matches, but my favourites are Alpha vs Alpha. The humiliation of an alpha having to submit to stakes is so hot...even in the rare cases I have had to be the one submitting (I much prefer winning though).

Fuck yeah man. So difficult to find guys here actually interested in fighting for alpha status, trash talking and getting real about male to male competition.

I think part of the problem is most people on here don’t realize that there is often a big difference between what they are attracted too and what they actually are willing to do in person. Saying they like something is turns them on, but they get nervous when it comes time to actually doing. Everyone which is which for themselves would go a long way in reducing the fakes and flakes on this site.

It's also difficult to judge the differences in stamina between the two adversaries. I have found with some guys that if the matches physically last too long for them then they are literally worn out before the fun can happen! But yeah you are undoubtedly right.

I wrestle for stakes more often than not. Usually the stake I go for is if I win, I keep your jockstrap as a trophy.

But I will also wrestle for sexual stakes. And while I do *want* to lose, I would never throw a match. If I'm going to wrestle for sexual stakes, I'm looking for a guy who is at least my equal. I have no interest in wrestling with a guy for sexual stakes if it's just a squash match (well, maybe if he totally outclasses me). But what really gets me going are matches with Alpha-Types who will still follow through and give up their ass if they lose, but are there with the intention of winning. This kind of thing unleashes the Primal in me like nothing else. Win or lose, I'm all-in, and I'm pretty much only Interested in sexual stakes with other guys who are all-in. But like others have said, those guys are rare

Awesome keeping your opponents Jockstrap as a trophy as stakes. !!!

Agreed. I live a competitive hour for stakes, it’s a big turn on. But nothing is a bigger turn off than setting everything up and then when you meet, the guys is a total jobber and just lets you win. When meeting a guy, I would so prefer him to just tell me he wants to job than lie to me about a competitive match.

Its not much fun if the other guy is trying to lose.

It's not my interest, but that is the whole Idea behind pro wrestling, which has a huge following. That's why I watch MMA and not wrestling

I agree with what folks are saying. I don't think a stakes match can be one-sided but the stakes have to at least push the normal limits of what the loser would be into. I enjoy getting dominated in a match, but I can't say I would typically ask to have all of the punishments doled out to me that I've been put through afterwards...

Stakes sould be realistic and encourage a competitive fight otherwise it wont work in my opinion. If sex is just the goal of a fight i would not call it a competitive fight and i guess
there will be better places to reach that (submissive) goal.

How about a good judicial strapping for the loser?

To make it more interesting you could use a www.wheeldecide.com wheel to dictate the number of swats the loser has to take.

Losers have to report to the discipline officer who will Judge about the implements and the number of strokes and dish them out professionally and severely.

What about a punishmenthorse as furniture in the lockerroom?

Paddled and then forced to be a bench...nice!

There is in fact the sex-match interest group precisely for that!

I agree, but what if it was winners choice for stakes? Might give both the urge to win.

I agree with many of the comments year and I think winners choice is the best but not revealed until the flight is decided. That way there is more of a motivation to fight for the win because you don’t know what you could face if you lose.

Some i have talked to want to lose. For stakes I try to find the more competitive guys for stakes. I am competitive and want to win and try to find guys that are of the same mind set for stakes.

I think that for the most part your conclusion is correct. Many of the post match punishments that people describe are so violent and/or sadistic that I suspect that they reside exclusively in the real of fantasy.

None the less there are exceptions. I wrestled for relatively modest stakes one time. I found that a wager on a wrestling match adds the same kind of intensity, and in my case a desire to win, that a wager on a football game does. The fact that it also added an additional erotic component to the match was a bonus.

I agree with you on that one, I think a lot of the posts are in the realm of make-belief and are never executed, that's a bit the downside of this interest group, very few are actually doing what they claim they want to be doing. And tons of the posters have 0 adversaries to their namesake...

The vast majority of posters want to lose. If that is the case, there can’t be stakes or spoils since there is no “match” to win It’s just sex.

Convince me otherwise.

Well there's two things right? There's the competitive aspect of winning the match itself, and then there's the more sexual aspect that may come after... Just cause you might be passive in bed does not necessarily mean you can't put up and win a good fight when push comes to shove. But I think then the stakes need to be adapted in such a way as to motivate the sexual desires of both guys. There should be something to aim for if you win, and something unpleasant if you lose!

I agree to that. Stakes should be unpleasant to the loser to encourage the fight.

Precisely! That would encourage a more spirited fight if that is the issue!

Right, but the vast majority of the guys in this forum talk about how they’d love to lose and perform the stated stake. That sort of defeats the point when their intent is to lose. It’s no longer stakes - it’s just sex.

I concur with you :)

I always wrestle to win. In a stakes match - even more UP to wrestle hard and win - make the opponent feel the punishment on the mat. Make him pay the price of the agreed upon stakes.

Hehe what sort of punishments are you dishing out then? ;)

Serious stakes i agreed for are for instance gutpunching, spanking, forced workout to exhaution, being dropped in just fighting gear and sneakers 15 km from home.

Being dropped off and walking home is a stake.

I guess running home would be a better option!

One and a half hour to arrive and get your personal belongings back sounds challenging but fair to me :-)

What happens if you don't get back in time?? hehe I tend to dislike stakes that take you outside the environment you are wrestling in, but maybe an equivalent version could be just the trick!

Both competitors make their personal clothing ready for shipping before the fight starts. The winner will put the package on the post if you arrive to late so you have to go home in just your short and sneakers.

Claiming the losers jockstrap as a trophy is a stake i use quite often and i wear them with pride if i win!

I like the Time limit. Good motivation!

Haha the last one would definetely get me to not LOSE!

We should do,a stakes match when I’m over there

You would be hosted with the necessary honours befitting you. ;)